When should a person start dating after a divorce?

My divorce just barely this week got finalized. We have been separated for 2 years I have been in therapy for 2 years. I do have 4 kids 10, 8, 7, and 6.

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    7 Responses to When should a person start dating after a divorce?

    1. DadsDivorce.com says:

      Honestly, each person is unique and divorce affects each of us in very different ways. For some, the divorce may be an extremely painful process to heal from and it could be years, while others feel more relieved and ready to move on with their life after the final decree has been given. It really depends upon you and how you feel on the inside. Just remember, you are redefining who you are as a person as the individual you were as a couple no longer exists. This means that all of your hopes, goals and dreams as a couple were dissolved and you must find yourself again, re-focusing your goals as a single person.

      It is common for one to experience an array of emotions before, during, and after a divorce. Sadness, anxiety, loneliness, and isolation are just a few of the emotions that one could experience. The most daunting of it all seems to be the actual "change" of an entire life.

      Divorce is not only dealing with the loss of someone that was once a life partner but the circumstances surrounding the entire event are often what lead people to feeling anxious. If one pondered all of the change that exists through a divorce then it would be easier to understand why it is a tremendous process to recover from.

      Divorce is nothing short of complete disarray but there are ways to cope and typically things get better with time. Part of the healing process is rediscovering oneself.

      There will be good days and bad days throughout the recovery process but ultimately it is up to you to put your best foot forward in the direction of a new life just waiting for you to embrace it. It is never too late to start over and find happiness all over again.

      You might want to check out the article I linked to in the source from DadsDivorce.com that offers some helpful thoughts about ways to recover from your divorce. There are actually a lot of similar articles that discuss dealing with the after effects of divorce that you might be interested in.

    2. K8 says:

      When you feel ready.

      Of course, raising your children needs to come first. They will need you.

    3. Bill C says:

      Date when your family and friends aren’t going to think it is weird that you are dating. Remember that what you do will effect your herd of kids.

    4. clysm says:

      you don;t have to date straight away, not publicly, you can present as a friendship to all involved first.

    5. YULIYA says:

      Whenever YOU feel ready, don’t bother about what others might think or say. It’s your life,do what you want to do.

    6. Chocolate Boricua says:

      Whenever you feel ready. Nobody can know that but you.

    7. csroberts says:

      I waited 2 years. I did not want to be angry or gun-shy when I started dating, so that’s how long it took before I was ready. I had one date, met her on a dating website, turned out she was married, probably trying to piss off her husband enough to make him fly straight. After that I waited another 4 years, then the compatible women just started pouring out of the woodwork (from this dating website). I mean, for me to date 6 people in 12 months is a lot for me.

      So, you are ready to date when
      – you aren’t angry or bitter
      – you aren’t desperate or needy
      – you are curious as to who is out there

      You don’t have to be ready for a long term relationship, just get out there and have a little fun, meet people, and see who is out there.

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